Pleasures

She found herself at 65 telling younger friends that there was nothing to getting old, quote pleasurable really, for if this or that good took itself off, then all kinds of pleasures unsuspected by the young presented themselves, and one often found oneself wondering what the next surprise would be. 

~ Doris Lessing

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Today is Dale Dickey's 65th birthday (amybe). I like her. I read this about her when she found out she was nominated for an Emmy for Widow's Bay, "I'm scrolling [Emmy nominations] and I get to Supporting Actors in a Comedy, and as I'm scrolling, I see my fucking face - excuse my language - but I'm like, 'No, why is that... What?"

I like people like that. People who are humble and swear and get recognized for good work. And I like that she survived being bitten by a copperhead because if I am ever bitten by a copperhead I would also like to survive, so she is kind of my inspiration about that.

Freedom

Freedom is what you do with what's been done to you.

~ Jean Paul Sartre

- - - - -

One time I was at the dog park and this guy was telling me about how he got moved to remote work during the pandemic, but he really liked it because it gave him a sense of freedom. Then he said, "And you what freedom is another word for?" And we both said, "Nothing left to lose" at the same time.

After that he talked for a while about how much he liked Bob Dylan lyrics. I didn't tell him that "Freedom's just another word for nothing left to lose," is from "Me and Bobby McGee" and that Bob Dylan didn't write it.

The guy seemed like he was on a roll and I didn't want to stifle that energy.

Chair

I wonder what chairs think about all day - "Oh! Here comes another asshole!"

~ Robin Williams

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As I write this, I am sitting in a bad chair. I will be getting a new one soon, but for now I have this not so good one. You don't really appreciate a good chair until you are sitting in a broken one. Kind of like most things. Because you're so ungrateful.

Imagination

Keep some room in your heart for the unimaginable.

~ Mary Oliver

- - - - -

What is the difference between "imagination" and "hallucination"? Well, spelling for one thing.

Sharing

(photo from internet posted by Janet Beadle - Abbie's mom. Thanks for inspiring this blog entry.)

It ain't no fun if the homies can't have none.

~ Snoop Dogg

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When I was in maybe 10th or 11th grade, we had Mr. Hakeman for Sociology (and I think another course, I forget what it was). Anyway, he had a rule in his class. No gum. And if you got caught with gum, then you had to bring in gum the next class to share with everyone.

Carmella Kennedy got caught chewing gum one day. Mr. Hakeman told her to bring in gum to share with everyone in the next class. She brought in a package of these tiny size chiclets. I am not sure I ever had more respect for a classmate in my life. And I was jealous that I hadn't gotten caught chewing gum and done this same thing.

I don't know where she is now, but all respect to Carmella. This is probably one of many things that inspired me to appreciate people who violate the rules - without causing permanent damage to anything or hurting anyone.

People are the best sometimes.

Grass

Sitting quietly, doing nothing,

Spring comes and the grass grows by itself.

~ Toyo Eicho

- - - - -

And the grass grows a little better with a little dog urine. But too much dog urine is not good for the grass. Everything, as they say, in moderation. Even dog urine.

Advice

                                               

My grandmother once gave me a tip:

In difficult times, move forward in small steps. Do what you have to do, but little by little. Don't think about the future or what may happen tomorrow. 

Wash the dishes.

Remove the dust.

write a letter.

Make a soup.

You see?

Advance step by step.

Take a step and stop.

Rest a little.

Praise yourself.

Take another step. 

And then another.

You won't notice, but your steps will grow more and more.

And the time will come when you can think about the future without crying.

~ Elena Mikhalkova

- - - - -

My grandmother once gave me a tip, "If you have something to ask me, ask me yourself don't send your brother in here to do it!"

Different grandmothers, different kinds of wisdom.

Autumn

Notice that autumn is more the season of the soul than of nature.

~ Friedrich Nietzsche

- - - - -

I love autumn. I love it. it brings me so much joy. It is as if I have held my breath all summer and now I can breathe again. 

Lily agrees.

Heart

You never know what's in a person's heart until they're tested, do you?

~ Fanny Flagg, Fried Green Tomatoes

- - - - -

I do think you learn more about a person's heart when they're tested, but I don't think everyone has to go in for heart tests. Sometimes we can just learn things without a medical procedure.

Skylines

Only from the heart can you touch the sky.

~ Rumi

- - - - -

Rumi didn't know a lot about space walks. I still like some of what he says, though.

 

Love

The best portion of a good man's life: his little nameless unremembered acts of kindness and love.

~ William Wordsworth

- - - - -

I sent my brother a card that said, "My brother shit his pants on a roller coaster. This is one of my many nameless (though not wordless" acts of kindness and love toward him. I'm a good sibling.

 

Scars

To be alive at all is to have scars.

~ John Steinbeck

- - - - -

That mean lion in the Lion King was the most alivest of all, then. (pause) Well, at least he was aliver than his brother for most of that movie. 

Reflection

I am who I am, not necessarily the successes I have achieved.

~ Connor Weir

- - - - -

It's important to pause sometimes and think about who you really are. That way when people tell you something about yourself that isn't accurate you can say, "You don't even know who I am!!!" with a lot more conviction.

Reality

I'm a lover of what is, not because I'm a spiritual person, but because it hurts when I argue with reality.

~ Byron Katie

- - - - -

If you just stop and take a look around, the world can be a beautiful place. There really is beauty in the trees and the people around us and the light sometimes glowing green in the world and in the loud honking of the cars behind you at the stoplight..

Cake

I wanted to buy a candle holder but the store didn't have one. So I got a cake.

~ Mitch Hedberg

- - - - -

Is it real or is it cake? I do not care.

Franktographer

If you've lived, you can be a mentor.

~ Leah Hughes

- - - - -

This is Frank. Frank is my mentor. If you don't have a mentor, you should get one. Not Frank, though. He's busy. Or maybe just get yourself some Mentos. Maybe that's what you need. I don't know your life. 

 

WIND

The little cares that fretted me,

I lost them yesterday

Among the fields above the sea

Among the winds at play.

~ Elizabeth Barrett Browning

- - - - -

Depending on how strong the wind is you might not only lose little cares, but also little cakes or even little cafes. Or big ones. I mean, the wind can be pretty powerful.

Notes

He said forgetting was easy; it's the remembering that wears you down.

~ Diane Wilson

- - - - -

I write down a lot of things. I like to keep notes because it helps me concentrate. Also, my handwriting isn't that good, so I can write what I REALLY think during meetings and people can't read it. I think that is probably good for me as the writer and for everyone else as the non-readers. 

Win-win.

Mountains

You can get all As and still flunk life.

~ Walker Percy

- - - - - 

One time on the first day of class I said, "If you get 95 points out of the 100 points for this course, you don't have to do the bonus assignment because you'll have an A. Unless you feel like you need to get all 100 points, which I don't know why that would matter."

The students stared at me. 

I think getting all the points maybe mattered to some of them.

Writing

Never take a writer

for granted.

~ Nikita Gill

- - - - -

I was going through my old journal as I got ready to start my new journal to make sure I had done everything I needed to do based on notes in my old journal. I came across this idea I had:

Write a monologue about a person who was bullied at school as a child and also they were homeschooled.

That's the kind of idea you don't want to get lost in one of your old journals.

Nose

Sometimes opportunities float right by your nose. Work hard, apply yourself, and be ready.

- - - - -

I'm naturally curious.

Or nosey.

Unbearable

Even the most unbearable things become fossils aftter a while.

~ Patrick Ryan

- - - - -

Even the most unbearable people become fossils after a while, too. And, ironically, the same is true of bears.

Justice

I have always found that mercy bears richer fruits than strict justice.

~ Abraham Lincoln

- - - - - 

You can hold people accountable and they might learn something. You can show kindness and care and they might learn something else. Or you can ignore them and what they do all together and they will learn something still different.

It depends on what you want to teach. And your mood. 

Mustache

Whenever I'm sad, I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches.

~ Liam Payne

- - - - -

I have an idea for a TV Show. It's called Manopause.

That's all I've go so far. Just the title.

Wisdom

Inside every large story there are always plenty of smaller ones.

~ Fredrik Backman

- - - - -

I love this quote. I love the idea that the big stories are not the whole story. The big story is far less than the sum of its parts. The big stories matter but neither more than less that the little stories.

And if you ever started to tell a story and you forgot what you were going to say and you were around my mom when it happened, she would tell you, "It was probably a lie."

You and I both know she's probably right.

Writing

I suppose half of writing is fighting the revulsion you feel when you sit down to do it.

~ Flannery O'Connor

- - - - -

I like to write. I like the part where everything flows super smoothly and what you have created is complete and you are really satisfied without having to second-guess yourself.

I mean, I would like it if writing was like that.

I still like writing, but it has never been like what I said. However, I'm pretty sure I'd like it if it was like that. Instead you write something and think, "I should find a synonym for 'like' for this blog post."

Motivation

My toxic trait is when I find out someone doesn't like me, I try to make it worse.

~ Sweet Motivation

- - - - -

Sure there have been people in my life who haven't liked me. I'm not always likable. But that isn't my goal. I sometimes lose sight of my goals, though. Like when my finger gets on the lens while I'm taking a photo. Or when I take a nap. or when I get a spam text.

Anyway, my goal is to try and pet a lot of dogs.

Birds

If you want to, you can find a million reasons to hate life and be angry at the world. Or, if you want to, you could find a million reasons to love life and be happy. Choose wisely. 

~ Carl Welsh

- - - - -

Honestly, I don't have time to find a million reasons for anything right now.

Mushrooms

If only one could tell true love from false love as one can tell mushrooms from toadstools.

~ Katherine Mansfield

- - - - -

If you have false love, it probably makes your stomach hurt the way toadstools do.

Quiet

The quieter you become, the more you can hear.

~ Ram Dass

- - - - -

I like hanging out with Leslie. She is pretty quiet. I am also quiet sometimes. Is it the same as hanging out without her? No. Companionable quiet is a bit better, I think. Unless your companion is the Tasmanian Devil from Looney Tunes. That would not be quiet at all. Even when he isn't spinning around and stuff, he breathes loudly and moistly.

And just to be explicitly clear, Leslie doesn't do that.

Miracles

Want to perform a miracle? Forgive yourself.

~ Rune Lazuli

- - - - -

I think forgiving yourself is indeed a miracle. I mean, its not like turning water into wine or walking on water or raising the dead, but still, it's fine. 

 

Listening

[I am a] book historian who tells students constantly that if they listen to the audiobook, they are literally reading 18th century novels the way the large chunk of the original audience experienced the book. Silent, solitary reading by eye alone is so, so recent!

~ Dr. Emily Friedman

- - - - -

I think audiobooks are fine. They are just like real books. Some are good and some are not good. Which is just like people. Some are good and some are not good. Which is like my blog posts. Some are good are some are not good. And if my blog ever gets made into an audiobook, this post will have come full circle.

 

Art

Art isn't in the tools, material, and equipment that you use. It's in the way you see the world.

~ Rick Rubin

- - - - -

I have probably posted about this before, but it is important enough to me that I want to post about it again now. I hate it when I take a nice photo and someone says, "That's a nice photo. What kind of camera do you have?"

I always tell them, "Art isn't in the tools, material, and equipment you use. It's in the way you see the world. Your photos are rubbish because of your outlook, not because of your camera."

No one every asks me that same question twice.

 

Balls

Problem is, y'all got league dreams with backyard work ethic. And your parents applaud it.

~ Dawn Staley

- - - - -

You know, if you can juggle croquet balls, you can juggle anything. At least anything the approximately same size and shape as croquet balls.

Beauty

I thought the most beautiful thing in the world must be a shadow.

~ Sylvia Plath

- - - - -

I thought the most beautiful thing in the world must be a dog.

Toy

Dogs need to play.

~ Kong web site

- - - - -

Truth.

 

Integrity

If it is not right, do not do it.

If it is not true, do not say it.

~ Marcus Aurelius

- - - - - -

I did a treasure hunt thing for Zak one time. I hid clues and he had to follow the clues to get to the end. Along the way there were treasures for him to collect. I put one of the clues in the refrigerator along with $2. Zak took the clue and then put the $2 back in the refrigerator.

I'm not sure if that was integrity or something different - like foolishness. 

(pause)

I'm going to pretend it was integrity.

 

Tools

It's okay if you aren't quire sure how to implement all the tools, techniques, and words of wisdom you've been reading about yet.

~ Lis Olivera

- - - - -

I started using tools when I was pretty small. My dad was a carpenter and he showed me how to use different tools. I remember pulling nails out of boards so we could reuse the wood. I didn't learn to use all the tools he had and I certainly didn't learn to use tools as well as he could use them.

I also learned it takes a lot fewer tools to break something than to build something. Sometimes it takes no tools at all to break something. Like someone's heart. Or a sweat. Or the Guinness World Record for hot dog eating.

Anyway, tools.

 

Hearts

What happens when people open their hearts?

They get better.

~ Haruki Murakami

- - - - -

It's good to have an open heart. It makes you a better friend, partner, parent, grandparent.

It's also good to have open heart surgery if you need that. It makes you better. In a different way, but still...

 

Garage

I sat in a garage and invented the future.

~ Steve Jobs

- - - - -

Last December we got new garage doors. The light on my side hadn't worked for months and then the door on my side started popping out of the track. We were able to fix it a couple of times, but finally decided that we needed to replace the doors. 

I had looked online to try and fix the light when it first quit working and I found a model by the same name from 1974. There wasn't a manual online. The garage door guy said that since our doors didn't have sensors they had to be older than 1993 or 1994 when those were first required for garage doors.

Leslie thought I was weird for being so excited about the garage doors, but I was. I love them. They look nice and they work. But I reflected some more on why I was so excited and why she didn't think it was a big deal. I realized she didn't care that much because her door didn't pop off the tracks on the light on her side never quit working. 

Sheesh, Leslie.