Privacy

It's Facebook, Dad. It's all defamatory.

~ Helen Tudor-Fisk

- - - - -

When we try to pry into other people's business, there isn't a lot of good that comes from it. It takes our time, we get distracted or drawn down rabbit holes, and we rarely find exactly what we are looking for. Just let others do what they need to do. It's not our concern.

But if you do find out things that are scandalous, tell me. That way I will know what you know without doing the work and then I can be all judgmental of you for poking your nose where it doesn't belong. 

I'm just kidding. I really don't like to be in the loop. At all. 

Daybed

A dog on the bed is worth two on the couch.

~ Michelle Boettcher Proverb

- - - - -

One day we found a dog running around in Betty's yard. At first I was very excited that maybe Betty got a new dog. Then I realized she was gone and the dog had come in through the open gate. We got the pup to come into our yard. Lily was excited at first but quickly grew bored of the other dog.

The dog had a collar but no tags. We called the police who couldn't take the dog at the time and then we posted in a neighborhood social media outlet. It was cold at the time, so we brought the dog in - watching it closely in case it wasn't house trained (it was). We sat down to watch some TV and Lily took her place on the couch and the pup climbed up on the back of the couch to relax with us. The pup kept a paw on Lily as much as it could.

It made me think, "What would it be like to have two dogs?" I was picturing it and how it might complicate some of the travel we did and adventures that we had with Lily. Just as I was moving to problem-solving how we would navigate things with a second dog, the owner called us.

I was relieved, ultimately.

Anyway, I like dogs. 

 

Stories

(Photography by Richard Boettcher)

Our stories are the greatest legacy we will leave to our friends. A life story is the longest-lasting legacy you will leave to future generations.

~ Steve Saint

- - - - -

Kirk: Have you looked through the slides of Mom and Dad's honeymoon?

Me:   I skimmed them. I didn't look at them for detail.

Kirk: I'm going to send you one right now.

(He sent me the image above)

Me: Yes..?

Kirk: Look closely at the name of the place up the street...

Me: Oh. Wow.

Kirk: RIGHT?! 

Turns out there was a Glory Hole mine and this was the Glory Hole hotel. 

Semantics. Context. Language is hilarious.

Also, I bet they might name it something else if they discovered it today.

Town

Towns are like people. Old ones have character, the new ones are interchangeable.

~ Wallace Stegner

- - - - -

I don't know if I believe that new people are interchangeable. I do believe that their names are sometimes interchangeable because I usually forget people's names when I first meet them. That's part of my character as an old one. 

(pause)

A medium old one.

 

Giving

Our politicians should recognize that because children are our future, ensuring every child has access to quality education is an investment that pays dividends for future generations.

~ Laura Numeroff

- - - - -

Aurora: You want cake now?

Me: Yes, please.

Aurora: You want a glass of milk?

Me: That would be wonderful.

Aurora: If you give a Mimi a pice of pineapple upside down cake, she's gonna want a glass of milk.

Dreaming

Why does the mind see things more clearly in dreams than the imagination when awake?

~ Leonardo da Vinci

- - - - -

The other night I had a dream that I was in an Irish pub. Lily was there, though she was not drinking. No one had an issue with me having a dog in the bar. What was stranger is that no one had an issue with me ordering a wheat beer in an Irish pub. 

Bobbing

Keep bobbing, and we'll come right by and by.

~ Louisa May Alcott

- - - - - -

I like how these photos of bobbers turned out. I took them on a trip at the end of the spring semester last year.

(pause)

Good thing I liked these photos because I sure didn't catch any fish.

Chair

At the end of the day, the most overwhelming key to a child's success  is the positive involvement of parents.

~ Jane D. Hull

- - - - - -

Zak: (working on a treasure hunt) Papa, I need your help.

Kirk: What is the clue?

Zak: This is a place I know you have been

         People sit here to type on a screen.

Kirk: Where have you looked?

Zak: The computer.

Kirk: Where do people SIT at the computer?

Zak: Um... a CHAIR!!!

Flamingo

What the flamingo teaches a child, at that subliminal where animal encounters work, is that gravity is not just a limitation, but also a possible partner in an intriguing, potentially joyful game.

~ John Burnside

- - - - -

"Why is it so hard to catch a flamingo," you ask?

Because they're called "flaminGOs" not "flamingCOMEOVERHEREs".

Also, why exactly are you trying to catch flamingos?

Energy

 

It takes as much energy to wish as it does to plan.

~ Eleanor Roosevelt

- - - - -

I don't waste my time wishing harm on others. I plan for it.

Surroundings

Before you diagnose yourself with depression or low self-esteem, first make sure you are not, in fact, just surrounded by assholes.

~ Debi Hope

- - - - -

This is really wise advice. If you think you may be surrounded by assholes but you're not sure, you are. I really very probably am sure that you are. And if you have to ask, don't ask them. People get really touchy when you ask, "Are you, in fact, an asshole?"

 

Hands

It is in your hands to create a better world for all who live in it.

~ Nelson Mandela

- - - - -

Last fall I was teaching on the first day of class. I like to try and learn a few things about students when I first have class with them. I wondered how many introverts and extroverts were in the class. I asked them to raise their hands. I started to say, "Raise your hand if you're an introvert," but I realized that was not the way to go. Instead I said, "Stand up and sing 'Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star' if you're an introvert."

(pause)

I'm just kidding. I asked the extroverts to raise their hands. I might try this other thing next time, though.

Ethics

Lying and stealing are next door neighbors.

~ Proverb

- - - - -

If we say that shoplifting is okay if the shop owner is awful, that's a slippery slope. Well, it's a slippery slope if the shop is on a slope and it's icy out.

 

Tired

Life is one long process of getting tired.

~ Samuel Butler

- - - - -

When you are tired, you should rest. When you are tired of certain people, you should get away from them. A good thing to do is to tell them you have to leave because you have to go take a nap.

Home

Love your home and it will love you back.

~ Rodika Tchi

- - - - -

It's nice that this place lets people stay in the church while they are having their homes renovated.

Rocks

The greatest legacy you can leave your kids are happy memories; those special moments so much like rocks on the beach that are taken from the white sand and put in tiny boxes that lay unopened on shelves until one day they fall out and time repeats, with joy and sadness, in the child who is now an adult.

~ Og Mandino

- - - - -

Dear beneficiaries,

Og Mandino said I should leave you a box of rocks for your inheritance. So, here you go.

Love, Michelle.

Endings

It is easier to resist at the beginning than the end.

~ Leonardo da Vinci

- - - - -

Some people think that endings are sad. That just isn't true for every situation. The end of a relationship can be hard. The end of a bad relationship can be hard, but once it's over then you can write short stories about that person. Of course when you get to the end of those stories that can be sad. But then you can write other stories. When those end you should probably get up and do some chores because you've been sitting around writing stories for a long time now.

 

Coke

In general the churches, visited by me often on weekdays... bore for me the same relation to God that billboards did to Coca-Cola; they promoted the thirst without quenching it.

~ John Steinbeck

- - - - -

I'd like to have the money to buy the world a Coke.

(pause)

That's right. I said what I said.

Gagets

When Michael and my daughter Finty saw those[Bond] movies, they screamed with laughter because I look like I can work all those gadgets - but I'm the person who can't work a bicycle pump. So, I'm drunk with power playing M.

~ Dame Judi Dench

- - - - -

Having the title "Inspector Gadget" is more impressive than the title "Gadget Inspector."

 

Kitchen

Everything happens in the kitchen. Life happens in the kitchen.

~ Andrew Zimmerman

- - - - -

I was thinking about the play kitchen I had as a kid. My dad made me a little stove out of wood. It was big enough that when we were small, we could get into the oven. I can't believe we never played Hansel and Gretel.

Anyway, my Grandma and Grandpa Hamlin had owned a furniture store. When Grandma sold the store, we got some things from it. One of the things was the fake food they used in the kitchen display areas. I remember having. plaster of Paris celery and white, chocolate, and butter milk cartons, and some other things. I don't really remember any meat, though. 

I guess we use to play vegetarian kitchen when I was a kid. I mean, other than cooking the small kids in the oven.

Shadows

There is a strong shadow where there is much light.

~ Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

- - - - -

You should never show up spontaneously for job shadowing. It really freaks people out.

Or so I have heard.

From someone who wasn't me.

 

Hell

Hell is truth seen too late.

~ Thomas Hobbes

- - - - -

I recently heard someone say that a person was "going to hell on a scholarship." I thought that was brilliant. Then I thought, "Hey, wait. I know exactly who they're talking about!"

Clean

When your environment is clean, you feel happy, motivated and healthy.

~ Laila Gifty Akita

- - - - -

After watching videos where people clean up unattended yards or power wash walls and steps, I got a power washer and finally used it last summer. It was less a thing that I felt needed to be done (hardly anyone notices when your concrete is dirty) and more a thing that has been therapeutic for me. 

What you don't see in these photos is that I had to stop at one point and there is a big contrast between the part of the concrete I cleaned and the part I did not. I will get to it eventually.

When part of your environment is clean and right next to part of your environment that is not you feel slightly less happy but slightly more motivated than before.

 

Stir

Those who stir shit up

Should have to lick the spoon.

~ American Proverb

- - - - -

I know some people who say they like to stir things up. They say that they enjoy conflict. That is not how I experience them. I see them coming in, stirring shit up, and then saying, "Okay, I have to go to another meeting now." 

That's not engaging in conflict. That is simply being the source of conflict. 

I would say "You know who you are," but I am confident they do not, in fact, know who they are. 

(pause)

They are NOT the people in this photo. I just used it because it was a photo of stirring. A stirring image, if you will.

Friends

One of the most beautiful qualities of true friendship is to understand and to be understood.

~ Lucius Annaeus Seneca

- - - - -

Are you ever talking with a friend and you are trying to think of the right word for a story you are telling and you can't think of the word? You know the word, but it slips your mind. When that happens, the word for the experience is "lethologica." It is highly unlikely in the midst of the moment that you forget a word that you will say "I am having a lethological moment right now..." because you're not going to remember the word "lethologic, either.

Life is hard.

But at least you have a friend to tell stories to.

Daily

The sky is the daily bread of the eyes.

~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

- - - - -

Bread is the daily bread of the stomach. So are tacos and lasagna.

 

Crossing

Courage is crossing a starting line.

~ Amy Burfoot

- - - - -

Crossing things can be important. Crossing things off a to-do list. Crossing that bridge when you get to it. Crossing your Ts (after dotting your Is, of course. Well, you can cross your eyes, too but that isn't what this is about. Unless I stop writing now. Then it IS what this is about.)

 

Robot

We're fascinated with robots because they are reflections of ourselves.

~ Ken Goldberg

- - - - -

The tin man in the Wizard of Oz was a robot. He wanted a heart. I don't think most robots want a heart. I think most robots don't really want anything. They don't try new things. They just do the things they were programmed to do. Like the robot Yoda who was programmed to say "Do. Or not do. There is no try."

Waffle

Who has more fun than people?

~ Jim Frazier

- - - - -

Based on the image above, waffles are happy and have fun. Or, perhaps, in nature when threatened, waffles wave their arms and legs and open their mouths in what is meant to be a threatening manner.

(pause)

I'm not going to lie. I am not threatened by this waffle.

(pause)

However, another not lie is that if this little waffle showed up at my house, I would probably run screaming away from it. I mean, who expects that of a waffle?

 

Sharp

In nature there are few sharp lines.

~ A. R. Ammons

- - - - -

In nature there are many sharp people. Sometimes they just get dulled not from use of their sharpness, but from being forced to be dull by those around them. I don't know why some people don't love to see others shine... Stupidheads.

Pardon my language.