Holidays

A severed foot is the ultimate stocking stuffer.

~ Mitch Hedberg

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I think a good movie would be about someone who goes around following people at the holidays. It could be called "Christmas Stalkings." And I think Kevin Bacon could play the villain - because he's good at those parts. But then, maybe at the end, there's a big turn-around and Santa shows up and kills off Kevin Bacon. And he hacks him up into pieces and one of the elves could walk by and say, "You making Bacon Bits?"

That way it would end on kind of a funny note and not make everyone afraid of the holidays. And it would also help with the sale of home alarm systems and bacon.