Character

We are like chameleons, we take our hue and color of our moral character from those who are around us.

~ John Locke

- - - - -

I have been doing a lot of reflecting lately. I have been trying to take time to think about what I value, how I want to spend my time - especially my mental time - and how to make different things fit in ways that align with what I want to prioritize and what I value.

Kirk emailed me and asked how I was doing. I shared some things I was working through and some things I had been trying to figure out. He was wonderful, supportive, and asked me good questions. When he wrote back, I think he was encouraging me not to give time to people who don't lift me up and inspire me, but he didn't write "them," "him," or "her," at the end of the sentence. Instead he wrote this: 

Seriously though, don't waste your time with you.

(pause)

If that wasn't a typo, he might be one of those people I need to not give time to as this neither lifted me up nor inspired me.

Ice Cream

My advice to you is not to inquire why or whither, but just enjoy your ice cream while it's on your plate.

~ Thronton Wilder

- - - - -

As Aurora recapped the previous evening's bedtime story, David felt his eyelids getting heavier and heavier. In a few moments there would be scraped knees and elbows and a cone melting on the ground. 

Aurora never told that story again. 

Within

Anything that has real and lasting value is always a gift from within.

~ Franz Kafka

- - - - -


However, not everything from within has real and lasting value. If you've ever changed a baby's diaper, you know this to be true. And if you haven't ever changed a baby's diaper, maybe you could try and be more helpful when you're around babies.

Doughnuts

Mmmmm... Doughnuts.

~ Homer Simpson

- - - - -
 
If you see a van transporting delicious doughnuts, I understand why you might want to follow it. Of course it could be empty. Don't be sad, though. If it is empty, it's probably headed back to the doughnut place where they have doughnuts.

Adventures

Adventure is worthwhile.

~ Aesop

- - - - -

Leslie is my favorite person to have adventures with. It could be going around to do the waterfall tour that Kathryn suggested. It could be appreciating the unexpected as we travel to Pennsylvania or Iowa. It could be finding new parks to explore. We have lots of adventures.

Usually the adventures leave us with good memories and good stories. Like recently when we were driving back from Iowa. We stopped at Denny's for dinner. When we went to pay, the woman started to ring us up, then paused and said, "Are either of you truckers?"

Matic

When you have learned compassion for yourself, 

compassion for others is automatic.

~ Henepola Gunaratana

- - - - -

Just matic because you don't always have time to spare to read "AUTOmatic." Also the diagram looks a little like a Frankenstein head.

Traveling

When we get out of the glass bottle of our ego and when we escape like the squirrels in the cage of our personality and get into the forest again, we shall shiver with cold and fright. But things will happen to us so that we don't know ourselves. Cool, unlying life will rush in.

~ D. H. Lawrence

- - - - -

I need to travel every once in a while so I remember that there is a world beyond my daily routine. I go and see different things or different places and that allows me to see my own world and spaces differently. 

Plus, let's face it, I just need to get away from some of you once in a while.

(pause)

I know the feeling is mutual, but it's more mutual on my side.

Hiding

Don't wait to be hunted to hide, that was always my motto.

~ Samuel Beckett

- - - - -

I think it's funny when kids hide in places like this. I mean, she's doing a horrible job of hiding. Unless, of course, she has given herself a horrible self-haircut, in which case she is doing an excellent job of hiding that.

Papa

Dads are most ordinary men turned by love into heroes, adventurers, storytellers, and singers of song.

~ Pam Brown

- - - - -

My brother teaches his son kindness, humor, and wisdom by being kind, funny, and wise. More importantly though, he teaches it by recognizing moments of kindness, humor, and wisdom in Zak when Zak engages in that work.

And it is work. It is much easier to be unkind, somber, and to exercise poor judgement. To have a good life takes work. To be happy takes effort. 

So get to work.

Kirk does the work.

Zak does the work.

And if a little kid can do the work you can, too. Not because you are stronger and better and smarter than a little kid. He's got you beat on all of that. But because you allegedly have a longer attention span.

Pay attention. 

Cranberries

If you take cranberries and stew them like applesauce, it tastes much more like prunes than rhubarb does.

~ Groucho Marx

- - - - -

I love cranberry sauce. I love making cranberry sauce. If there was a competition for the best cranberry sauce, I wouldn't win. Mine is really good, but I'm busy the day of the competition.

Still

There are many ways of going forward, but only one way of standing still.

~ Franklin D. Roosevelt

- - - - -

I think I get the idea behind this quote, but at the same time I suspect that FDR never played "freeze tag" as a kid.

Log

The ideal college is Mark Hopkins on one end of a log and a student on the other.

~ James A. Garfield

- - - - -

Wow.  So I just did a little research because I was wondering where "log" or "log book" comes from.  I saw this photo of a tree wedged in a tree and thought of logs and thought of log books.  I guess it has something to do with boats.  You can do this thing where you have a log attached to a rope and you drop it in the water and boat away and if you know how to do the 'rithmetic, you can figure out how fast you're going and write it in your logbook.  Then you can go back and read it later.

I imagine you can do this - again if you know the math - if you're driving, as well.  However, expect some trouble if you throw a log on a rope out of your car window.  Some people don't understand the old ways of the old days and will probably have a conniption fit about that.

Parking

The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking spaces.

~ Will Rogers

- - - - -

I see things like this and am inclined to think, "I think it should be no parking ON this block." But I think being that specific about signage is kind of a jerk thing to do. 

So my new thing is to think of ways - when I see signs like this - that they could be saying what they actually mean.

Like there is a motel near us and the sign says things like, "Welcome New Bedding" and "Pet's Welcome." And what if "New Bedding" was the name of a band staying at the motel? Or what if there is a ceremony called the "Pet's Welcome" ceremony anytime a dog or cat stays at the motel?

I don't know. Those could be real.

Dry Ice

Persistence is to the character of man as carbon is to steel.

~ Napoleon Hill

- - - - -

If you played curling on dry ice you might choose to hold a carbonspiel. Or you might realize that playing anything on dry ice is a really bad idea. Or not. I'm not the boss of you.

Squirrel

The squirrel is inadequately afraid of humans! Squirrel, I am a threat to you! We are enemies! Please get off my bench! Oh god! Oh god! Don't touch me - oh god!

~ John Green

- - - - -

I have been trying to slow down. I think most of us rush through and around things too often. We miss good stuff. We miss important moments. Leslie gave me the imagery of "squirrel brain" which is when I let my thoughts snowball instead of staying in the present moment and enjoying the world around me.

I picture a squirrel running on one of those rodent wheels. Running and running. Or scurrying around the cage grabbing and burying things in a frenetic way. 

And then I wonder where they got a rodent wheel big enough for a squirrel because you mostly see those wheels for mice or smaller animals. And also how big would a squirrel cage need to be? And how unhappy would the squirrel be to be in a cage? And would it have dirt so the squirrel could bury its acorns and stuff because I know they like to do that. And what about climbing? Do they get sad when they don't have anything to climb? And if you included things for them to climb then, well, you'd need an even bigger cage than you had before. And how did you decide to cage the squirrel, anyway? Did you take it in as an orphan squirrel? Did it have some sort of leg injury and you nursed it back to health?

I'm not saying squirrel brain is a good analogy to how my brain works sometimes, I'm just saying it's a thing Leslie suggested.

Gate

He who wants to do good knocks at the gate, he who loves finds the gate open.

~ Kahlil Gibran

- - - - -

Gates are both about keeping out and keeping in. Just like walls. Or moats. Or invisible fences.

But as they say, "Good invisible fences make good invisible neighbors."

Play

Play is the beginning of knowledge.

~ George Dorsey

- - - - -

Leslie was playing "I'm going to visit Aurora in her cage." Aurora was playing, "I'm going deep sea diving to see the Great GoGo Shark while I'm safely in my cage."

(pause)

Actually, I think they were just laughing and talking, but I was trying to make a point about perspective.

Ride

If you surrendered to the air, you could ride it.

~ Toni Morrison

- - - - -

I am not sure if Kirk is surrendering to the air. I am not sure he is riding it. I am pretty sure though that this is the look Kirk gets on his face when he has managed to get into a child-sized ride and is not sure if he can get out again.

Caution

Eggs have no business dancing with stones.

~ Haitian Proverb

- - - - -

Snickerdoodles have no business dancing with hummus.
                                              ~ Boettcher Proverb

Porch

I'm not the type to sit on the porch and watch life go by.

~ Sally Rand

- - - - -

I am the type to sit on the porch and watch life. However, I think you can live life while you're watching it. And I think most people live life without watching it. They get distracted by noise and lights and stuff.

I get distracted sometimes, too. However, I'm not sure I believe that sitting on the porch and watching life always means that you are watching it go by. Sometimes you can live pretty fully by watching.

And I have had the opportunity to sit on some pretty amazing porches.

Spoon

The book is like the spoon, scissors, the hammer, the wheel. Once invented, it cannot be improved. You cannot make a spoon that is better than a spoon.

~ Umberto Eco

- - - - -

When I saw this, I posted to Facebook - "I know what to do when I come to a fork in the road, but what do I do when I come to a spoon on the stairs?" or something like that.

I was just kidding. I know that you pick it up and recycle it so no one falls on it.

(pause)

Not all of these posts are meant to be funny. Sometimes I use my art to educate, as well.

You're welcome.

Also, I wonder what the person who dropped this struggled to eat when they got to class.

Elegant

Elegance does not consist of putting on a new dress.

~ Coco Chanel

- - - - -

If you have things you don't want, I think you should try to get that stuff to someone who does want it. Or better yet, someone who needs it. But you have to be prepared that not everything you love will be appreciated by someone else. Sometimes one man's treasure is another man's junk.

Not that I feel compelled to get into a long conversation about men and their junk.

I feel compelled to get into a long conversation about "Parks and Rec" because I like that show.

Truth

Truth uttered before its time is always dangerous.

~ Mencius

- - - - -

Truth uttered at exactly the right time sometimes isn't heard because it is uttered.

Work

Work isn't to make money; you work to justify life.

~ Mark Chagall

- - - - -

This is a photo from my work. It was from teaching research last fall. I try to bring humor into the classroom. I know not everyone loves the idea of research, so I used this image of Zak eating capers to show how you might not love something at first, but you might still be interested in it. Zak ate capers, made this face, and ate more capers.

Additionally, research can make you feel this way at times. I have yet to have a project go completely smoothly. There are always obstacles, challenges, and some self-doubt in the process to me.

I'm not teaching research this fall. I don't think it's because I compared doing research with eating capers.

Work is fun.

Shell

There is only one real deprivation, I decided this morning, and that is not to be able to give one's gifts to those one loves most.

~ May Sarton

- - - - - 

Especially when a restraining order is the reason one cannot give those gifts to the one loves most.

Play

Everybody needs beauty as well as bread, places to play in and pray in, where nature may heal and give strength to body and soul.

~ John Muir

- - - - -

I don't like it when people say, "This is a game changer!" and they aren't talking about a game, but they are talking about painting their house or doing their laundry. First of all, maybe I liked the game the way it was before and second, not everything has to be a game, and finally, quit overusing phrases. 

Zen

Zen is a matter of character, not a matter of intellect.

~ D. T. Suzuki

- - - - -

I have a a book of Zen stories that I am reading. I read a few every so often. I don't understand a lot of them. Some I understand for a second and then I don't understand them again.

I'd like to be Zen. Or achieve Zen.

I called this blog "Realizing Zen" because I don't think you get Zen through work, but by not working at it. But you still have to think about the fact that you're not thinking about it.

You have to just let it come to you, I guess.

I don't now. Whatever it is, I'm still trying to understand or to let go of understanding so that I get there. 

One day maybe it will happen. That will be amaZEN. 

Produce

Shall I not have intelligence with the earth?

Am I not partly leaves and vegetable mould myself?

~ Henry David Thoreau

- - - - -

There is a potato company that has an ad campaign right now about bribing your kid to eat her broccoli by giving her three french fries when she eats some of her vegetables. 

1. My parents would never have done this.
2. Why do we have to pay kids to do what they are supposed to do?
3. Do they really HAVE to eat broccoli? I get it if they won't eat any vegetables at all - maybe you have to get them to eat something vegetablish to get their nutrients. But if they hate broccoli, why force them to eat broccoli?

One time my grandma made something with tuna and something gelatinous in it. I don't know what it was. I didn't want to eat it. My dad made me eat it. It made me gag. I got in trouble for that. 

I still think my grandma should have gotten in trouble for making something with tuna and something gelatinous in it.

Library

Giving is a necessity sometimes... more urgent, indeed, than having.

~ Margaret Lee Runbeck

- - - - -

When you give someone a story, you give them something they can take with them forever.

Unless it's in a really heavy book. Or a concrete book bag. But why do you even have one of those? 

Question

Judge a man by his questions rather than his answers.

~ Voltaire

- - - - -
When you ask a question you probably sometimes think you know what answer you're going to get. Or you have it narrowed down to two or three possible answers.

Sometimes you are surprised.

Like when I asked a friend why we had to cancel our plans for the next day when we were going out for drinks after work, and she said we had to change the time because the other person joining us wasn't going to be at work tomorrow because she had to get a root canal.

Then my friend added, "I wish I was getting a root canal tomorrow!"

That was an indication to me of how unhealthy our workplace was.