Bottles

There's not a man, woman, or child on the face of the earth who doesn't enjoy a tasty beverage.

~ David Letterman

- - - - -

I love to buy lemonade from kids selling lemonade at lemonade stands. I love it. I will always stop. If I don't have cash, I will go get cash and then I will go back. 

One time I drove by the little park near our house. There were three kids selling lemonade. I didn't have any cash, but I had some rolls of quarters at home. I went back and gave them each a roll of quarters. They were so excited.

I did it because that was the cash I had on hand. More importantly, I always overpay because I think when you're first starting out in business, you need a little boost every now and then. It could come from a patron or benefactor or it could come from a random person or from happenstance. No matter what, we can always use that.

The lemonade is almost always bad, but the service is almost always excellent at a lemonade stand. 

Like the saying goes, when life gives you lemonade stands, pay up.

Farm

"Hot Corn - A spin on hot potato..."

~ Illinois Corn Grower's Association "9 Games to Play on the Farm with Children"

- - - - -

Really, ICGA? You could have just shared EIGHT games instead of stealing hot potato. 

Also, I'm pretty sure these little buildings weren't used to store corn, so I'm just waiting to get yet another hostile email lecture from the ICGA. I know it's coming. And it is definitely warranted.

Moon

The day, water, sun, moon, night -- I do not have to purchase these things with money.

~ Plautus

- - - - -

One time I was watching a lunar eclipse. I thought about the universe and God and miracles. The next morning on social media, The Onion posted this headline:

God Admits Humans Not Most Impressive Creation

Things like that are why I believe in God and that They have a sense of humor and perfect timing. As for you... you go on ahead and believe what you want. I'm not the boss of you.

Teaching

The art of teaching is the art of assisting discovery.

~ Mark Van Doren

- - - - -

I wish my students would remember that when I scream, "Looks like I'm going to have to teach YOU a lesson!!!" it's just my way of teaching. 

Feather

If it's not bold, if it's not ruffling feathers, what's the point.

~ Chappel Roan

- - - - -

As I get older, I like to watch birds more. Especially birds like the one in this photo. 

Watching.

Don't blink. You must never blink.

~ Michael Caine

- - - - -

It is pretty well-known that I do not care for dolls. I don't like the way they look. I don't like the way they look at me. It is rude to stare.

Apparently it is also rude to knock over a display of dolls in an antique store. 

Meaning

We are making photographs to understand what our lives mean to us.

~ Ralph Hattersley

- - - - -

Lily is not my life. I have lots of other things going on. However, she definitely gives my life meaning. She is pretty significant. It's nice to be welcomed home, to be in such a safe place that she can fall asleep on my lap or leaning against me or on my feet. 

And while I like to make other people feel safe, I don't want most of them falling asleep on my lap or my feet.

Parents

It is an act of violence when an adult yells at a child. All adults know that deep down because all adults were once little.

~ Fredrik Backman

- - - - -

What if the parent entrance wasn't about a door or an opening to get into a place, but instead was the parent enTRANCE where parents get filled with wonder and delight and their attention is held?

What if?

That isn't rhetorical.

WHAT IF?

Pirate

If you want to get my attention, wear a pirate outfit.

~ Michelle Branch

- - - - -

Would I like to see pirates fight Noah's Ark? 

What a stupid question.

Of course I would.

 

Dying

Your feelings can still be hurt by a dying person.

~ Liane Moriarty

- - - - -

But not for long.

 

Friends

Ultimately it's a sense of camaraderie and friendship with local people that is core to my journeys.

~ Tim Cope

- - - - -

Lily is always interested in local people. And distant people. And all people. Except for three times when she met some guys she didn't like at all. Don't know why she didn't like them, but I trust her. Well, I trust her judgement of people. I don't trust her at all with a loaf of bread. 

Party

Design a menu which will allow you to actually be a part of the dinner 

party atmosphere.

~ Kerth Gumbs

- - - - -

You know, they call it "The Donner Party," but based on what I know about it, it doesn't sound like much of a party at all.

 

Pieces

I never fall apart because I never fall together.

~ Andy Warhol

- - - - -

This is one of the most difficult puzzles I have ever done. I got it on sale. I like Andy Warhol's art and some of his quotes. I don't think we would have been friends, though. I know he'd invite me to go to his events and I'd say I would go and then I wouldn't show up. Then he'd get angry and either talk about me behind my back or just quit inviting me. We would drift apart. We would both miss each other at times, but, in the end, he would be glad he moved on so he didn't feel rejected by me, and I would be glad he wasn't inviting me to his parties anymore. 

Also, he shouldn't have been inviting me to his parties. I think his biggest events at The Factory and Studio 54 were in the 60s and 70s. I was too young to be going to parties then. I don't know what he was thinking.

 

Mother

Is my mother the most interesting things about me? Maybe.

~ Liane Moriarty

- - - - -

I think interesting mothers make for interesting children. If you've met a boring child, they likely come from a boring mother. I would suggest that the child's mother is probably pretty momotonous.

Clouds

I'm leavin' on a jet plane

I don't know when I'll be back again...

~ John Denver

- - - - -

I recently found a cover of the song "Leaving on a Jet Plane" by Lake Street Dive featuring Tiny Habits. It is amazing. As soon as you're done reading this, go listen to it.

Anyway, having listened to it many, many times recently, and I've been thinking about the lyrics... 

I'm standin' here outside your door

I hate to wake you up to say goodbye

But the dawn is breakin' 

It's early morn

The taxi's waitin' 

He's blowin' his horn

And I have some questions. 

What door are you standing outside of? The door to my house? My bedroom door? If the latter, how did you get into my house? Also, why didn't you let me know that you were coming by so I would be awake? 

Also, are you sure I'm actually still asleep? I mean, the taxi is blowin' his horn. I think that probably woke me up.

I'm not really sure about this relationship, to be honest.

Now, seriously, go listen to the Lake Street Dive version of the song with Tiny Habits. It is outstanding.

Geese

If you feel the urge, don't be afraid to go on a wild goose chase. What do you think wild geese are for, anyway?

~ Will Rogers

- - - - -

A few nicknames for Canadian geese that you may not be familiar with include: "flying rats," "snot rockets," "cobra chicken," and "sky carp." What is strange is that these are also nicknames I gave to my brother Erik. You might think it is mean since he wasn't actually Canadian. But I have two thoughts on that: first - it's the fact he wasn't Canadian that makes you think that was mean? And second, I didn't ask you want you thought, snot rocket.

Radio

"The Chordettes are all dead."

~ Me.

- - - - -

Not only did I not imagine myself every saying the sentence above, but I didn't imagine saying it to little Ezra.

(pause)

He took it pretty well.

 

Swimming

All good writing is swimming underwater and holding your breath.

~ F. Scott Fitzgerald

- - - - -

Leslie says all the time that I'm Lily's favorite.

Leslie: If we were drowning and she could save only one of us, she would choose you.

Lily and I look at her in silence.

Leslie: Good thing I'm a strong swimmer.

Photos

Photographs and memories

All the love you gave to me

Somehow it just can't be true

That's all I've left of you

~ Jim Croce

- - - - -

This goes out to someone, you probably don't know who you are. Just so you know, I saw that great photo you took and posted on social media in 2022. I didn't like it because I didn't want to weird you out.

Smile

That's why rich adults hate the sort of thing that Louisa paints on the side of buildings - not because they love walls but because they hate the fact that there are beautiful things that are free. 

~ Fredrik Backman

- - - - -

I'm no expert, but I don't think going to your store and seeing someone had painted "Smile" on the door will make you smile.
 

Animals

I really don't think I could consent to go to heaven if there were no animals there. 

~ George Bernard Shaw

- - - - -

I was typing up something the other day and autocorrect thought I was writing about all of the animals getting on "Noah's arm." 

Some days in their learning the robots take a step back instead of constantly moving forward...

Boats

Land was created to provide a place for boats to visit.

~ Brooks Atkinson

- - - - -

My nephew Zak is fascinated with Titanic right now - the boat, not the movie. He can tell you how many dogs survived (3), how many people survived, how long it took the boat to sink, how many decks, etc. On a recent visit, he bombarded me with these and other facts.

However, I know some things about the Titanic, too. 

Me: You know what else they had a lot of on the Titanic, Zak?

Zak: What?

Me: Water.

Ellipses

This suspense is horrible. I hope it will last.

~ Oscar Wilde

- - - - -

I know that this is not an ellipse. It is a set of holes left by birthday candles. However, when read as an ellipse it lends an ominous energy to her birthday doesn't it? Yes. Yes, it does.

Towels

Why do we wash bath towels? Aren't we clean when we use them?

~ Steven Wright

- - - - -

The other day I spilled something. It wasn't a huge spill, but it was more than a drip or a dribble, so I asked Leslie to bring me a throuple of paper towels.

 

Letting

Letting go means realizing some people are a part of your history, but not a part of your destiny.

~ Steve Mariboli

- - - - -

The above quote is exactly what I said as I let go of my grandmother's hand and let her plummet to her death off the side of that cliff. 

Friends

The friends who listen to us are the ones we move toward, and we want to sit in their radius.

~ Karl A. Meninger

- - - - -

When I had Ripley, he could tell from the sound of a car who was coming home or to the house. Lily doesn't quite have that, but there is one car she always recognizes - her friend Mia's pink Barbie Jeep. 

Driving

A single sunbeam is enough to drive away many shadows.

~ St. Francis of Assisi

- - - - -

Darkness comes in many shapes and forms. Sometimes human. Sometimes spiritual. Sometimes social or political or economic. 

Fortunately, sunbeams come in many shapes and forms, too. Lines and circles and in the shape of apple-driving worms wearing Tyrolean hats. 
 

Sunrise

At sunrise the blue sky paints herself with gold colors and joyfully dances to the music of a morning breeze.

~ Debasish Mridha

- - - - -

When you wake up, you think, "Wow. An ideal day. So much ahead of me. No flaws in this moment. Things are perfect so far."

Maybe. But you made a TON of mistakes yesterday. 

Mom

God could not be everywhere and therefore he made mothers.

~ Jewish Proverb

- - - - -

 I thought it was really sweet when she texted me this a couple of years ago.

I would freak the hell out if she texted me this today.

Washing

Life is a daily cleansing. Negativity must be washed away if you wish to attract positive experiences in your life. 

~ Leon Brown

- - - - -

(Silence violently disrupted by Leslie's stomach)

Me: It sounds like the alien monster is going to pop out of your stomach.

Leslie: That would be be gross.

Me: Yes, it would.

Leslie: You'd have to clean it up.

Me: No, I wouldn't. I'd have to clean myself up because I'd shit my pants. 

Sites

The man who never alters his opinions is like standing water, and breeds reptiles of the mind.

~ William Blake

- - - - -

Leslie never lets me visit places like this. Granted, if she did let me stop at every roadside attractions Iw anted to see, we would add about 17 hours to every drive we ever make.
 

Sheriff

I shot the sheriff

But I didn't shoot no jeopardy

~ Bob Marley

- - - - -

I just realized my typo in the quote above.

I don't want to fix it.

I think you just need to think about it for a while.

Baby

Perfection only exists in babies and pastries.

~ Gayle Wray

- - - - -

Guy on Survivor Australia: I got up this morning and had a dingo's breakfast.

Me to Leslie: He ate a baby?

Motion

She wore enormous silver hoop earrings that grazed her shoulders. Nico was always telling her she'd get her earrings caught on something one day - a stop sign or passing businessman.

~ Rebecca Makkai

- - - - -

I don't laugh out loud very often. I especially don't laugh out loud when I am reading a book very often. This quote above made me laugh out loud. Thanks for that, Rebecca Makkai. 

Note: I don't think she reads my blog, but if she does, what a nice surprise this message will be for her!

Smile

The human race has one really effective weapon and that is laughter.

~ Mark Twain

- - - - -

I am sometimes caught off-guard by how similar my brother Kirk and I are. The other day we were texting and he typed, "I make me laugh." 

I type that all the time when I text people. 

Either Kirk and I are similar or he is a stupid copycat. Those are equally likely options.

Cavity

I like to see life with its teeth out.

~ Janet Frame

- - - - -

I don't know if this cookie pan is sexist or not. I just don't believe we should be awarding boys, girls, or non-binary children for having 12 cavities. Or even 11 cavities, for that matter. Clearly this type of child needs dental floss, not cookies. 

Family

Having a family is like having a bowling alley installed in your brain.

~ Martin Mull

- - - - -

I think family relationships are fascinating. You see similar behaviors or facial expressions or vocabulary unique to a particular family. And I like learning that people I know are related to one another - famous people or people just in my day-to-day life. I feel like it gives me inside information about them I didn't have before.

For example, the fact that I'm pretty sure Zoe Kravitz and Gladys Kravitz are related is interesting to me. 

(pause)

I also like that about half the people reading this won't know who Zoe Kravitz is and the other half won't know who Gladys Kravitz is. 

(pause)

One of my superpowers is spanning generations.

Ducktales

We quad-zillionaires have our own ideas of fun.

~ Scrooge McDuck

- - - - -

Zak also has his own ideas of fun. One is to watch the same episode of Duck Tales over and over and over again. I found it very boring. Except for that one scene where Ma Beagle sort of shadowed the security guard in Season 1 Episode 10: Robot Robbers.

(pause)

And, yes, I'm mildly annoyed that I know the season and number and name of the episode. Just goes to show you how many times Zak made me watch it, I guess. 

I did read that when we re-watch shows/series it is a form of self-regulation and can help us deal with anxiety. We enjoy the comfort of the familiar.

So maybe Zak didn't "make" me watch the show. Maybe he was making me anxious and I chose to watch the show. That is probably it. You know how children are. Sheesh.

Vision

If you have a vision, do something with it.

Anthony J. D'Angelo

- - - - -

If you have bad vision, do something about it.

Storm

There are some things you learn best in calm, some in storm.

~ Willa Cather

- - - - -

A lot of meteorology you learn best in storm.

Seating

The theater of my mind has a seating capacity of just one, and it's sold out for all performances.

~ Henry Winkler

- - - - - 

A lot of people don't know that I performed a very small part in an off-Broadway production of Our Town. I was "Woman in the Audience." 

It was pretty far off-Broadway... at my high school in a cornfield in central Iowa. 

Cat

Cats, as you know, are quite impervious to threats.

~ Connie Willis

- - - - -

I know that I have written about this at least once before (June 13, 2023) and maybe more than once. However, I am going through some old information I have chosen to hold on to and was reminded about more to the story that I thought I would share for your learning and growth.

One day, when I lived in Iowa, I was out driving around. I do that a lot, stopping to take pictures of things I see that I want to take pictures of. That is how probably at least 50% of the photos I use in this blog come to exist. I like driving. I like listening to podcasts or sometimes books. I like stumbling upon beautiful and interesting things.

Anyway, this particular day, I had just stopped and taken a photo of a barn. Suddenly, a car started following me. I was out on dirt/gravel roads in the country. I tried to slow down so they could pass me, but they just kept following. I wasn't about to stop without other people around, so I drove until I came upon a house where the guy was mowing his lawn. I pulled over on the road in front of his house so the car could pass me.

The couple in the car pulled up next to me and then accused me of abandoning kittens in the barn I had just taken pictures of. They were ticked off. I told them I hadn't done that. I don't have a cat and don't have kittens and am not the kind of person who would do that. I even had my camera (not just my phone) that day and showed it to them.

"I hope you can live with yourself because something is going to eat those kittens tonight -- if they don't freeze to death first!!" the woman yelled at me. I stared them down and then they drove off and said they were going to report me. 

No one from law enforcement ever followed up with me about the kittens.

HOWEVER, I told that story in a class I was teaching that semester. The next day I got an email from a student in my class. It was forwarded from a friend of hers. The email she forwarded read:

"If anyone in the Elkhart area hears about or happens to know anyone who suddenly has 6 older kittens and 1 mama cat - to a total of 7, please let me know as mine have been taken. I have my suspicions but no way to find out for sure."

I think she decided the kittens I found were too far from Elkhart to be hers, but how weird is that? 

What are you supposed to learn and how are you supposed to grow from that story? I don't know. I'm not the boss of you.

Chicken

Quit asking so many questions. A lot of what you're asking is really none of your business.

~ Chickens.

- - - - -

When I was a kid if someone was afraid of something, they would get called "a chicken." But, really, chickens are pretty tough. They have claws and beaks. 

When I was a kid, we watched some video in elementary school. I forget why we watched it, but it showed chickens pecking a baby chick to death because there was something wrong with it. It was probably a lesson on conformity and how good that is for society.

Anyway, besides the violence, I think a superpower that people underestimate with chickens is how they can make people's eyes swell shut. Well, people who are allergic to them, at least. That's pretty powerful in a fight.

Cow

Cows blur the line between tragedy and humor.

~ Gary Larson

- - - - -

Cows probably say the same about humans, but when they say it, it comes out as "Mooo."

 

Out

When in doubt, go out.

~ Ali Wong

- - - - -

One time this guy that I didn't know very well invited me to go out clubbing with him. I wasn't doing anything else, so I said, "Okay." Turns out he didn't mean going out to a club, but going out to club animals in the forest.

(pause)

I'm just kidding. I would never say, "Okay" to going out clubbing. 

 

Wildlife

Wilderness without wildlife is just scenery.

~ Lois Crisler

- - - - -

I love animals and the outdoors and wilderness and wildlife. One thing I don't like, though, is wildlife preserves. I prefer grape or strawberry. 

Fireworks

Leave the fireworks for those who cast no spark of their own.

~ Abbott Kahler

- - - - -

Dalton didn't believe in spontaneous combustion, but he also didn't want the fireworks stand to get too hot because he DID believe in regular combustion.

That said, he didn't really know what combustion was or that fireworks would only explode at 867 degrees and his little window unit wouldn't do much to cool down the fireworks stand if it was 867 degrees in there.

Unexpected

Criminals go on vacation, too.

~ Don Coelho

- - - - -

It is strange to think about some people doing regular things. For example: A serial killer eating Skittles.

(pause)

That's the only one I can think of right now.