Past

Should old acquaintance be forgot...

~ Robert Burns

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Some of them should.

 

Olive

 She didn't like to be alone. Even more, she didn't like to be with other people.

~ Elizabeth Strout, Olive Kitteridge

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I don't love olives, but they are easy to draw. I wish I did love them. Then I could write, "Olive olives."

My life is really hard sometimes.

Lily

 The bond with a true dog is as lasting as the ties of this earth will ever be.

~ Konrad Lorenz

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I am a much more social person when I have Lily with me than I am without her. I think it is because I feel an obligation since I represent her. She can't speak. She is nice and loving and generous. If I am my usual self, I am not doing right by her. 

Actually, when I am my nicest "I'm with Lily" self, I am not doing right by her - but closer to right. 

She is a wonderful dog. The weird part is that I think she thinks I'm a wonderful person. Don't misunderstand me. I AM a wonderful person. I just hide it really, really well. 

Except maybe from dogs.

Especially this dog.

Light

You don't find light by avoiding the dark.

~ S. Kelley Harrell

- - - - -

There is light all around us. Sometimes you have to look harder than other times. Sometimes you have to create the light. Sometimes you have to look inside to find the light. Sometimes you have to burn some things down to see the light. Sometimes when you're burning things down you dance and dance and scream with glee. 

Sometimes the neighbors make some calls and you see red and blue light.

Characters

Smart people focus on the right things.

~ Jensen Huang

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This is my nephew Zak (left) along with his cars Mickey (middle) and Donald (right). Zak loves his cartoon shows. I think he gets this from my brother. I don't remember all the cartoons Kirk used to watch. I know he likes Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and Scrooge McDuck, and Rescue Rangers and Muppet Babies and Scooby Doo.

(pause)

Maybe I do know all the cartoon shows he likes.

Anyway, one time when Kirk and I were children, we were traveling somewhere with the rest of our family. We had some trivia game and someone was asked, "Who are the master's of the renaissance?" - or something like that. I said, "I have no idea." 

Then Kirk, who was probably four or five said, "Leonardo, Donatello, Michaelangelo, and Raphael." 

I was - and I don't use this term lightly - gobsmacked.

"Is that when you knew Kirk was smarter than you are?" you ask. No. I asked him some long division problem to make sure he couldn't answer that. He couldn't. 

No, it was later that I realized he was smarter than I am. 

Also... like father, like son: 

Shadow

 Shadow owes its birth to light.

~ John Gay

- - - - -

I wonder if good must exist before evil can emerge. I mean, it makes sense in my own family. First I was born. Then Erik. Then - the most evil of them all. The shadow of the family. The dreaded Kirk.

Kirk owes his birth to me. I am the light that creates space for his shadow. I hope that sometime we go strolling down the avenue and that by then we learn to the lyrics to the song "Me and My Shadow." 

(pause)

I don't think that's going to happen.

Cold

I'm dreaming of a White Christmas...

~ Irving Berlin

- - - - -

I'm not. And if I was, I wouldn't be telling you about it because I would be asleep.

Santa

Believe in love. Believe in magic. Hell, believe in Santa Claus. Believe in others. Believe in yourself. Believe in your dreams. If you don't, who will? 

~ Jon Bon Jovi

- - - - -

So apparently, love, magic, others, me and my dreams are as believable as Santa Claus. Thanks, Jon Bon Jovi. Really. Thanks a lot for that.

Road

The road to enlightenment is long and hard, and you should try not to forget snacks and magazines.

~ Anne Lamott

- - - - -

Are there passing zones on the road to enlightenment? Because what if you get stuck behind someone who isn't progressing as quickly as you are?

I only ask because I feel that way a lot of the time.

Holidog

 Small cheer and great welcome makes a merry feast.

~ William Shakespeare

- - - - -

Lily provides a great welcome to anyone who comes to our house. She also is pretty full of cheer most times. These are good things since she is a horrible cook.

Winter

No winter lasts forever; no spring skips its turn.

~ Hal Borland

- - - - -

Winter in South Carolina is not like winter in other places I have lived. It isn't as cold. It is rarely snowy.  However, it is still a time to celebrate. To celebrate the changing seasons and moving forward. To celebrate the continuation of the cycles of life. It is worth celebrating just like one's birthday. Well, just like MY birthday. Or my half birthday. Or my quarter birthday. 

My birthday is is 197 days from today. That's something worth celebrating.

 

Birds

The freedom of birds is an insult to me.

~ Cormac McCarthy

- - - - -

So if your true love gives you a partridge, turtle doves, French hens, calling (colly) birds, geese, and swans you might want to find a new love because they aren't really that into you. They keep giving you the bird over and over and over again. Also, your house probably smells pretty awful.

Moon

The moon is a friend for the lonesome to talk to.

~ Carl Sandburg

- - - - - 

There are a lot of full moons on TV. I think maybe some of them are fake.

Dogs

A well trained dog will make no attempt to share your lunch. He will just make you feel so guilty you can't enjoy it.

~ Helen Thomson

- - - - -

 You are what you eat.

Neighbors

(photo by Kirk Boettcher)

We make our friends; we make our enemies; but God makes our next door neighbors.

~ Gilbert K. Chesterton

- - - - -

My brother sent me this photo at the end of last year. I chuckled and thought about the disruption of the scene and the fact that there are two Marys in this particular scene. A few minutes later, Kirk wrote me back and said, but look in the windows.

I don't know who these people are, but whoever they are I would like to be friends with them. That said, I want to be the kind of friends with them who talk out in the yard. I don't want to be the kind of friends who go into their house.

 

Adversity

We don't develop courage by being happy every day. We develop it by surviving difficult times and challenging adversity. 

~ Barbara DeAngelis

- - - - -

What if instead of advent calendars there were adverse calendars? Each day for a month there would be something negative in a little box. 

(pause)

I bet we'd be glad when that month was up.

Learner

It would be a terrific innovation if you could stretch your mind a little further than your next wisecrack.

~ Katherine Hepburn

- - - - -

Leslie likes to learn about as much as anyone I ever knew. She is always reading and sharing and looking things up. She wants to know as much as she can. She is not a know-it-all. She is an I-wanna-know-it-all. She is very smart.

She also still has things to learn. Like about dogs. And the answer to her never-resolved question, "What in the world are people like that?!"

Private

I don't know why people are so keen to put the details of their private life in public; they forget that invisibility is a superpower.

~ Banksy

- - - - - 

What the public thinks they know about a person and what they actually know that is accurate about a person is a mismatch. Even the people who know us best can't really know us. 

(pause)

At least those of us who are superheroes.

Musicians

Just start by creating your day. Then create your life.

~ Prince

- - - - - 

So if you ever get a book that looks like a kid's book for your nephew and it is about Prince, a couple of things:

1. Cool. Prince has some great music.

2. Prince didn't worry about conformity. That is a good message for kids to get.

3. Prince was very creative. It's good to inspire creativity.

4. Returning back to item #1, many of Prince's songs aren't really kid songs. Knowing this you should probably read the book before you send it to your nephew. Then when your brother asks if you were the one who sent your nephew the book and texts you some pages from the book one of which has the title "X is for X-Rated" you should be fully prepared to say that, "No. It wasn't me. It was John B. Nutting who sent Zak that book."

I don't know any of this first-hand. Just suggesting some ideas.

Contradictory

The writer who's afraid to contradict himself will never write anything. 

~ Marty Rubin

- - - - -

I think the sticker designer here messed up. I hate it when sticker people send contradictory messages. I hate it when stick people do that, too, but they are made of sticks, so they already have a lot that they have to deal with. 

Travels

Traveling -- it leaves you speechless, then turns you into a storyteller.

~ Ibn Battuta

 - - - - -

I agree with this, but I also think that you should be able to pull stories from your life when you aren't traveling. I heard someone say one time that things either go well or they become great stories. Yes. However, complaining about something is not the same as making it a good story. 

I could complain that our host was very curt with us when we arrived on a recent adventure. I could say the person was cranky and impatient and complained and did not make us feel particularly welcome when we arrived.

OR

I could say...

When we arrived, Lily was afraid to go down the steps of the ferry to get off the boat. A stranger tried to help by pushing Lily from behind. That was not helpful and in fact Lily backed up and tried to squeeze out of her harness. I went back up the steps and had Lily sit and wait until all of the noisy camping people and their squirrelly children got off the boat with their supplies which had been loaded onto the ferry from the back of a U-Haul. Literally a full U-Haul of camping stuff, clothes, and food for about 25 people. 

Anyway, Leslie helped me and we were able to coax Lily down the steps. We each took a load up the dock and there were a few bags left. Due to my poor packing, two of them were ridiculously heavy. I came up to meet Leslie and our host. As I bent over to adjust my grip on the bags, our host said, "You don't need to set those down. You're going to carry them over there," and she pointed across the parking lot to one of the further spaces. 

I grumbled, "I DID need to set them down to get a better grip," but I'm not sure she heard me. Probably for the best that she didn't.

Once we had loaded everything in the back of the vehicle, I said, "This isn't going to block your view, is it?" She responded, "I'm not driving. YOU are!"

See the difference between complaining and a story. I mean this story is a bit of a complaint, but there's more to it than JUST the complaining. 

(pause)

Okay, maybe this isn't an example of something not going according to plan becoming a GOOD story. I'll work on. This is just a first draft. 

Bubble

Look within. Within is the fountain of good, and it will ever bubble up, if thou wilt ever dig.

~ Marcus Aurelius

- - - - -

Sometimes things bubble up and pop out without you even looking within. Yes, I'm talking about dog farts. Was I too subtle?

Days

 Every day brings new choices.

~ Martha Beck

- - - - -

Leslie: (reading motivational and uplifting quotes) You can always make more money, but you only have a limited number of days to make memories.

Me: You only have a limited number of days to make more money, too.

Tacos

Tacos are like what the voices of a hundred angels singing Bob Dylan while sitting on rainbows and playing banjos would taste like if that sound were edible.

~ Isabel Quintero

- - - - -

I was recently engaged in a conversation where I was asked, "What is your favorite fast food." Another person then added, "There's only one right answer." 

I responded, "I feel like if someone says there is only one right answer, then their favorite fast food place is Taco Bell."

I was correct.

NOTE: These tacos are not from Taco Bell, but they are photos of tacos that I had available.

Awesome

The human capacity for survival and renewal is awesome.

~ Isabelle Allende

- - - - - 

Awesome has "we" and "me" in it. We is awesome and Me is awesome. 

But maybe not awesome at grammar.

Photography

Only photograph what you love.

~ Tim Walker

- - - - -

I prefer to take photos of others than photos of me. I love to take photos of Lily. She doesn't love having her photo made. That's okay. I understand what that's like.

This probably captures how we both feel about having our photo taken.

 

Stanley

Stanley, Part 3: The Conclusion

Anyway, Stanley sent a bunch of postcards to a third grader and his classmates. I did think it was cool that I knew a guy named Jeff Brown (also the name of the author of Flat Stanley), so I sent a photo of a bunch of his name tags, too.

I know this series of posts isn't what I usually share, but I wanted to do something different. This is a great example of "Things don't happen TO you, they happen FOR you" which is something I have been trying to hold onto. I know that sometimes bad things happen to you. However, as the Stoics say, the obstacle is the way. Sometimes things happen that inspire you to be more creative than you would have been if things worked out the way you wanted.

One of the themes of my life has been MAIL. I love photos of mailboxes. I like to send mail. And in my life I have received some very strange mail. Mostly NOT terrifying. To me. My mom... well, she has been scared a few times. Like when I got Barbie parts in the mail. 

Barbie body parts. Unsolved mystery of Flat Stanley. So many unsolved mysteries involving the USPS. 

Yes. Yes, I DID say "Barbie body parts." But that's another story for another time.

Sweet dreams, everyone.

Stanley

 Part 2: The Adventure Continues

Maybe it was for the best that Stanley got lost. As you can see, some of the photos I got of him weren't all that exciting. By a sign for a dam/reservoir. By a sign for a botanical garden. By a sign for Farm Bureau.

Since Stanley was lost, he would send postcards. Here are some of my initial thoughts inspired by Jared:

So, I was telling Leslie last night about some options and I said, "Jared suggested that maybe Flat Stanley got lost or something." I don't actually remember all the ideas Jared had, but I did think that maybe writing to schoolkids with messages like:

"I'm lost and scared. The only thing I can do is send letters."

"I don't know where I am right now. It's dark. And cold. And damp." 

"I'm so sad. And lonely. I keep thinking someone will come and help me, but no one does."

"Can't... hold out... much... longer..."

"A nice truck driver is giving me a ride. I hope he's not like the one that Kirk's mom always talks about."

Stanley

 

Part 1: The Adventure Begins

So one time I was asked to be a stop on a journey for Flat Stanley. I took this responsibility very seriously. I had Stanley visit a lot of interesting places. However, the people I sent him on to failed. Stanley's journey ended after his stop in South Carolina. I reached out to the teacher to take responsibility for what had happened.

Dear Mrs. HERNAME ISASECRET,

I sent a Flat Stanley update for Jude a few weeks ago. I then forwarded it to friends who had agreed to participate. Unfortunately, I got the update that there haven't been any messages from Jude's Stanley since South Carolina and my friends have not responded to my requests for a status update.

I don't want Jude to be left out of the fun, so I was wondering if it would be all right if I had some postcards sent "from Stanley" from different places instead of Stanley photos. I know that is not the exact purpose of the project, so I wanted to check before doing that.

Is there are a mailing address I could use? Or have you used other options in the past if a Stanley has gotten lost on his travels?

Let me know your thoughts / how I can help Jude continue to participate. I'm sorry for the inconvenience.

Best of luck with the rest of the term. I hope you have a wonderful break in the coming weeks.

Michelle 

I then also reached out to Kristy for additional information. While Stanley was missing, it didn't mean that Jude couldn't get MESSAGES from him!

Dearest Michelle, 

The address of the school is ALSO THIS SHOULD BE KEPT SECRET. 

I appreciate your help in this matter, please don’t feel that you have to do anything extra though. I hope Flat Stanley’s captors release him.

-Kristy

Kirk also brought his creative whimsy to the project.

OMG.  We should write a horror novel about the family that kidnapped Flat Stanley!!!!!!!!!!! 

Perhaps the title could be Flat Stanley and the Terrible Horrible No Good Very Bad Last Day of His Life!!!!!!

I don't know why Kirk thought there would be a FAMILY of kidnappers. He is a freak.

Also, I would totally read that book.

Confusing

Don't be afraid to be confused. Try to remain permanently confused. Anything is possible.

~ George Saunders

- - - - -

This picture on this sign is confusing. It says "NO LOITERING" but it doesn't say "NO POOPING ON THE STEPS."

So... is the person on the left in the wrong or not?

Mysteries

That's the beauty of the universe. 

There's always a new mystery.

~ James Rollins

- - - - -

I recently solved a mystery. We had a kitchen knife that had been missing for a long time. It was a bird's beak knife. We couldn't figure out what had happened to it because we are not in the habit of taking our knives out of the kitchen and - in all honesty - it wasn't a knife we used very much.

Then I was in the kitchen and used the scissors. We had put the bird's beak knife is the scissor slot and not realized it. The knife has been gone for months. Then we found it. It was a victorious and glorious day.

I have yet to solve the mystery of this "BUNNYTUNA" sign, though. However, to be completely honest, I haven't really tried.