Strange

I have learned silence from the talkative, toleration from the intolerant, and kindness from the unkind; yet, strange, 

I am ungrateful to those teachers. 

~ Khalil Gibran 

- - - - -

It seems strange to keep baby oil in a baby food jar.  Unless maybe it's for baby robots or baby engines.

Farming

A good farmer is nothing more nor less than a handy man with a sense of humus. 

~ E. B. White 

- - - - -

A friend recently suggested that to improve the image of soybean farming, that farmers refer to it as "edamame farming," instead.  It would impress the snooty people and make them think more of farmers.  Soy that way relations between human beans can blossom and we can get this country back on the right tractor.

Shoes

A shoe that is too large is apt to trip one, and when too small, to pinch the feet. So it is with those whose fortune does not suit them. 

~ Horace 

- - - - -

This is one of the shoes that I took on my trip to the San Juan River in Utah.  I love these shoes.  Unfortunately, when shoes are sucked into mud up to your ankle, sometimes they come off.  Or, if they are securely fastened to your feet, sometimes they break.

I thought I had brilliantly repaired my shoe with duct tape (see photo above).  But you know what doesn't hold up very well in water and mud?  Duct tape.

Kitchen

Music is the wine that fills the cup of silence.

~ Robert Frost

- - - - -

Elizabeth:  Maddie, come in the kitchen so I can teach you some German!

Food

I was 32 when I started cooking; up until then, I just ate. 

~ Julia Child

- - - - -

Chris:  What is this?

Helen (Chris' Mom):  Carrot Jell-O.  It's GREAT for funerals.

Songs

Every day we should hear at least one little song, read one good poem, see one exquisite picture, and, if possible, speak a few sensible words. 

~ Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe 

- - - - -

Time for a recap of songs in my head when I wake up in the morning for the past few months...  I didn't have music in my head when I woke up much in February, March and April.  But the times, they have-a changed...

February - no songs in my head.  That is sad.

March 13 - Rocket Man by Elton John
26 - When You're Next to Me by Mitch and Mickey

April 30 - Born this Way by Lady Gaga

May 1 - Almost Lover by A Fine Frenzy
3 - Come Softly by The Fleetwoods
4 - Jar of Hearts by Christina Perri
5 - You Can Get it If You Really Want It by Jimmy Cliff
6 - John Saw That Number by Neko Case
7 - Animal by Neon Trees
8 - Jar of Hearts by Christina Perri
9 - Chasing Pavements by Adele
10 - Warm Whispers by Missy Higgins
11 - Another Day, Another Dollar by Wynn Stewart
12 - Rolling in the Deep by Adele
13 - My Life Would Suck Without You - by either Kelly Clarkson OR the Cast of Glee (it was hard to tell which)
14 - The Israelites by Desmond Decker
21 - Marry You by Bruno Mars
22 - Mama, I'm Coming Home by Ozzy Osbourne
24 - Raise Your Glass by P!nk

June 1 - Jar fo Hearts by Christina Perri
2 - Falling In by Lifehouse
3 - S&M by Rhianna
4 - Rhythm of Love by The Plain White Ts
5 - Almost Lover by A Fine Frenzy
6 - Perfect by P!nk
7 - Take Care of Business (Pilooski Edit) by Nina Simone
8 - Please Don't Leave Me by P!nk
10 - Keep It Loose, Keep It Tight by Amos Lee
11 - Falling In by Lifehouse
12 - Feeling Good by Michael Buble
13 - Sesame Street theme song
14 - Sounds of Silence by Simon and Garfunkel
15 - Set Fire to the Rain by Adele
16 - Falling In by Lifehouse
18 - Judas by Lady Gaga
19 - Help Me Up by Eric Clapton
21 - Bang, Bang by Melanie Fiona
22 - Live Like We're Dyin' by Kris Allen
23 - Set Fire to the Rain by Adele
24 - Lazy Song by Bruno Mars
25 - Everywhere by Michelle Branch
26 - Jar of Hearts by Christina Perri
27 - Breakeven by The Script
28 - Forget You by CeeLo Green
29 - Serenity by Godsmack
30 − 500 Miles by The Proclaimers

July 1 - Set Fire to the Rain by Adele
2 - Drive by Incubus
3 - Edge of Glory by Lady Gaga
4 - Gimme Shelter by Kathy Mattea
5 - How Do You Do? by Roxette
6 - Give Me Everything by Pitbull, Nayer, Ne-Yo and Afrojack
7 - Give Me Everything by Pitbull, Nayer, Ne-Yo and Afrojack
8 - Appalachian Spring by Aaron Copeland
9 - Wouldn't It Be Good by Dahlia Wakefield
11 - Mighty Mouse theme song
12 - Dirty Laundry by Bitter:Sweet
13 - Winter Wonderland by The Eurythmics
14 - One's on the Way by Loretta Lynn
15 - Just Can't Get Enough by The Black Eyed Peas
16 - Breakeven by The Script
17 - Heartbreak Down by P!nk
18 - Firework by Katy Perry
19 - OMG by Usher featuring will.i.am
20 - The Way You Make Me Feel by Michael Jackson

Then I was gone to Utah.  I wrote down the songs in my head while I was there, but I don't have that notebook here right now.

28 - Animal by Neon Trees
29 - Everyday by Buddy Holly

August 1 - Wrong Baby Wrong Baby Wrong by Martina McBride
4 - Evacuate the Dancefloor by Cascada
5 - Rumor Has It by Adele
6 - Sweet Caroline by Neil Diamond
7 - Life After You by Daughtry
8 - It's a Beautiful Day by U2
9 - Firework by Katy Perry
10 - Take It Easy on Me by Beth Hart
11 - Edge of Glory by Lady Gaga
12 - I Run to You by Lady Antebellum
13 - Hold On, Hold On by Neko Case

Smell

Gardening is about enjoying the smell of things growing in the soil, getting dirty without feeling guilty, and generally taking the time to soak up a little peace and serenity.

~ Lindley Karstens

- - - - -

Chris:  What is that smell?

Me:  Yeah - Ames smells like...  like that today.

Chris:  Is it all the Republicans in town for the straw poll?

Lawyers

I busted a mirror and got seven years bad luck, but my lawyer thinks he can get me five. 

~ Steven Wright

- - - - -

I always wanted to be on the Supreme Court.  I tried to make good choices throughout my life so if the opportunity presented itself I would be cleared by any background check.

I tried to avoid "undesirables," so I never went to law school.  That fact makes it unlikely that I will ever be on the Supreme Court.

Stupid Catch-22.

Food

Life expectancy would grow by leaps and bounds if green vegetables smelled as good as bacon.  

~Doug Larson

- - - - -

You know what food I think they ought to sell at the fair?  

Karma Apples.  

You get what you deserve.  

Neighbors

A good neighbor is a fellow who smiles at you over the back fence, but doesn't climb over it. 

~ Arthur Baer 

- - - - -

Overheard at "Mother's Steakhouse" in Latimer, IA.

Woman 1:  Hello, neighbor!

Woman 2:  Hello.  I have to run, but I'll see you in church tomorrow.

Woman 1:  Oh, you're coming to church?

Woman 2:  Yes, I'll be there.

Woman 1:  Oh, good.  There'll be room for you.

Art

[Abstract art is] a product of the untalented, sold by the unprincipled to the utterly bewildered.

~ Al Capp

- - - - -

For the record, I do not necessarily agree with Al Capp.

And now, for your daily blog entry...

Yesterday I was in our basement and I saw two pieces of art.  The first was purple and unfinished and looked very interesting.  I asked Elizabeth if it was hers.

Elizabeth:  Yes.  Do you like it?

Maddie:  It is NOT yours, Elizabeth!  I made that.

Michelle:  Whose is it?

Chris:  Maddie's

Elizabeth:  Mine

Maddie:  Mine

Maddie:  It's mine.  It was supposed to be a flower, but I got frustrated and I quit.

Elizabeth then brought out her canvas.  It was spotted with paint of lots of different colors.

Michelle:  Jackson Pollock!

Elizabeth:  Yeah.  In art we had to do an artist and a bunch of kids wanted to do Jackson Pollock and then they flung paint all over and used up all the paint, so the teacher said no one else could do Jackson Pollock.

Power

Language exerts hidden power, like the moon on the tides. 

~Rita Mae Brown 

- - - - -

You know what else exerts hidden power?  An outlet under a rug.  And a genie in a lamp.  And static electricity.  And pheromones.  

Steps

What saves a man is to take a step. Then another step.
~ C. S. Lewis

- - - - -

First of all, the quote, I believe, is "The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step."  I am pretty sure that is correct because it is one of my favorite quotes.

You know what else begins with a single step?  A curb.  A curb is pretty much just one very wide, single step.

Stress

(photo by Chris Fowler)
If you ask what is the single most important key to longevity, I would have to say it is avoiding worry, stress and tension. And if you didn't ask me, I'd still have to say it.

~ George F. Burns

- - - - -

What if instead of looking for "stress relievers" we looked for "stress believers?"  I think that would give us support and would help us cultivate more stress because we'd have some validation.  And more stress means more energy and more productivity and a shorter life span.  So then we have population control.

But there should be a few of us (and by "us" I mean most certainly ME and maybe a few others) who will need to just sit back and observe.

Bricks

We don't need no education.

We don't need no thought control.

No dark sarcasm in the classroom.

Teacher leave the kids alone.

Hey, teacher leave the kids alone!

All in all it's just another brick in the wall.

All in all you're just another brick in the wall

~ Pink Floyd

- - - - -

I sent a friend of mine the song "Brick in the Wall" to help motivate her to get a faculty job.  I hope it helps.

Marketing

No great marketing decisions have ever been made on quantitative data.

~ John Scully

- - - - -

I really do think that I should have gone into marketing.  I have great ideas all the time for different companies.  For example, a while back I had the following ideas for the Dodge Caravan.

The first is a commercial with a woman putting on her makeup.  She is safely pulled over on the side of the road or maybe she's in her driveway.  It could be about the flexibility or accessories of the vehicle, how quiet it is, or the way you can escape the rest of the world for just a few moments when the rest of life is in chaos.  The tagline is, "Mascaravan."

The other one I had for the same product and the same series of ads has a family going on vacation.  To the van are attached things like bikes, canoes, skis, camping equipment, whatever.  The family is singing some song and driving down the road.  The tagline for that is "Dontcaravan" or "we don't have a care-avan."  

I haven't figured out the technical parts of it, but I work in creative.  I leave those details to the others.

Cake

(photo by Maddie Fowler)

I wanted to buy a candle holder, but the store didn't have one. So I got a cake. 

~ Mitch Hedberg 

- - - - -

Elizabeth:  I'm not having any babies because of "Cake Boss."

Now, I know this quotation had something to do with a specific episode of "Cake Boss" involving childbirth, however, I am not sure if population control is the primary goal Buddy Valastro has for either his bakery or the television series.

Regardless, I have written to every middle and high school in Iowa to suggest that they incorporate that specific episode of Cake Boss into their sexual education curriculum.  Or home economics.  Either really works.

Farmers

As the Republican platforms says, the welfare of the farmer is vital to that of the whole country. 

~ William Howard Taft 

- - - - -

I think they should make a video game about how an agrarian culture faces the end of the world.  I think that it could be pretty fun to see video characters fight with tractors and pitchforks and hay balers.  Mainly, I think they should make it because the name of the game would be "Farmageddon."  It's worth it just for that.

Sheep

Every man can tell how many goats or sheep he possesses, but not how many friends. 

~ Marcus Tullius Cicero 

- - - - -

When Elizabeth got her "pillow pet," she said, "Ooooh...  It's like sleeping on a lamb."

Now, I'm not an expert on sheep (or goats or car maintenance or much of anything else), but I would imagine that it is not a pleasant experience to sleep on a lamb.  However, I decided a long time ago that Elizabeth is probably wiser than I am.

And maybe that's where "counting sheep" comes from.  I don't really know how "counting" and "sleeping on" sheep equate, but maybe they do.  Or maybe the word "sleep" is derived from the word "sheep."  They have a lot of the same letters.

Travel

The World is a book, and those who do not travel read only a page.

~ St. Augustine

- - - - -

I think that if you go on a trip and the other people on the trip insist on calling you "The Queen" and giving you a throne and making you food and taking care of things for you, you should just go with it.  You don't want to offend them.  And also, they probably are particularly insightful and able to figure out your royal status and what is wrong with the rest of the world that they haven't figured out who you really are, anyway?!

Pills

Life is a pill which none of us can bear to swallow without gilding.

~ Samuel Johnson

- - - - -

Maddie (while trying to take enormous vitamins and having problems swallowing them):  You know, we could just practice swallowing them using almonds.

Michelle:  Right...  or quarters.

Trees

You will find something more in woods than in books. Trees and stones will teach you that which you can never learn from masters.

~ Saint Bernard

- - - - -

I think that it is good to have trees.  Without them, what would we cut down for paper?  And without paper, where would we draw pictures of trees?

I guess on doors.  Made of wood.  From trees.

Unusual

If you are not willing to risk the unusual, you will have to settle for the ordinary. 

~ Jim Rohn 

- - - - -

My fear is not that I would receive something like this as a gift.  In fact, I am a brilliant re-gifter / re-purposer / prankster.  I could do a lot with it.

No, my fear is that my neighbor will receive something like this as a gift.  And display it.  For all of eternity.

Desperate

A person, who no matter how desperate the situation, gives others hope, is a true leader. 

~ Daisaku Ikeda 

- - - - -

I see things and I get confused.  Now, this is not a difficult thing — to confuse me.  That, I will readily admit.  But can someone please help me understand for whom you would buy a wooden cut-out of the word, "Desperate?"

Bridges

It is not good to cross the bridge before you get to it. 

~ Judi Dench 

- - - - -

A bridge that lights up at night is better than one that doesn't.  "Why?" you ask?  Let me tell you why:

1. It looks cooler.

2. It is safer.

3. Need I remind you of the following proverbs:

     "A dark bridge means death or robbery to the weary traveler." ~ Romanian Proverb

     "Dark bridges and you might fall off ridges."  ~ Japanese Proverb

     "Bridges of light are better than those dark at night."  ~ Michelle Proverb

Sunsets

Clouds come floating into my life, no longer to carry rain or usher storm, but to add color to my sunset sky. 

~ Rabindranath Tagore 

- - - - -

I think that if I could be in charge of designing anything in nature, I'd want to do sunsets.  You get to use all the crayons and you don't have to color inside of the lines.

Cards

Greeting cards reflect the social fabric. And this is an unusual aspect of society.

~ Barbara Miller

- - - - -

I like giving people cards.  I think doing so says, "I was thinking of you, but not so obsessively as when I made that collage of pictures I took of you while I was stalking you."

Legendary

I won't be a rock star. I will be a legend. 

~ Freddie Mercury 

- - - - - 

Elizabeth:  Is this Queen?

Michelle:  No.  It's A-Ha.

Elizabeth:  It sounds like Queen.

Michelle:  No.  It's not.  Queen would not sing this song.

Travel

One’s destination is never a place, but a new way of seeing things.

~ Henry Miller

- - - - -

Today I leave for Utah for a canoeing / kayaking trip.  It is with a bunch of student staff from Outdoor Recreation.  I am going to do my field research for my capstone.  You don't have to call me brilliant because I planned such a fun project.

No.  You can call me brilliant for a lot of reasons.  That is just one of them.

Chaos

Chaos in the world brings uneasiness, but it also allows the opportunity for creativity and growth.

~ Tom Barrett

- - - - -

Elizabeth: (humming)

Maddie:  Elizabeth, STOP!

Elizabeth: (humming)

Chris:  Elizabeth, stop.

Elizabeth:  I stopped.

Michelle: Not the first time you were asked.  Not that you were asked.  Maddie, it would be nice if you said, "please."

Maddie:  I said, "Elizabeth, please stop."

Chris & Michelle:  No you didn't.

Chris:  You might have thought it in your head.  I do that sometimes.

Elizabeth:  I don't.

Passion

Nothing great in the world has ever been accomplished without passion.

~ Hebbel

- - - - -

I have a friend whose passion is bike riding. I have another friend whose passion is cooking. I have another friend whose passion is travel I have another friend whose passion is art.

I think my passion is my blog. And I think when I blog about other people's passions, I get to share them. That makes me passionate about everything.

Well, not everything. there are some things I don't blog about. I'm not so passionate about those things. I can't think of what those things are right now. But one of them is NOT biking. You know that because I have two bike-related photos in this blog which means I'm really passionate about blogging about biking.

Ocean

A mountain is composed of tiny grains of earth. The ocean is made up of tiny drops of water. Even so, life is but an endless series of little details, actions, speeches, and thoughts. And the consequences whether good or bad of even the least of them are far-reaching. 

~ Sivananda 

- - - - -

Elizabeth:  Why is the toilet water blue?

Michelle:  We had the old water replaced with ocean water.

Elizabeth:  MICHELLE!

Foot

The human foot is a masterpiece of engineering and a work of art.

~ Leonardo da Vinci

- - - - -

Once upon a time, Elizabeth suffered a tragic flip-flop / bicycle injury that resulted in a very damaged toe.  She had softball, and Chris "encouraged" her to go to the game and play.

Later that evening, the following exchange transpired...

Chris:  Elizabeth, I'm proud of you for trying this.

Elizabeth:  You kinda forced me.  Not kinda.  You did.  If it was up to me, I'd be at home with my foot elevated and an ice pack.  But, no, it's crammed in the smallest shoe ever.

Chris:  I hope it doesn't get infected and fall off.

Journey

Let your mind start a journey thru a strange new world. Leave all thoughts of the world you knew before. Let your soul take you where you long to be...  Close your eyes let your spirit start to soar, and you'll live as you've never lived before.

~ Erich Fromm

- - - - -

I would have liked to have been an explorer.  I think if I was out exploring, though, I'd grab some other guy and say, "You walk in front, that way you can say you discovered whatever we find."  Then, when he fell off the edge or or got killed by something, I'd still be alive and I could say I discovered it.  I am pretty sure that's how Roald Amundsen, Jacob Roggeveen, and Neil Armstrong all did it.

Vacation

I've been things and seen places.

~ Mae West

- - - - -

I think it's simple enough to understand why people need vacations.  Just break down the word "vacation..."

Vay — as in short for "vaya" which in Spanish means "go."  Also, a variation of "Vey" as in "Oy, Vey" which in Yiddish means "Oh no, I need to get away" or, more literally, "Oh, woe."

Cay - short for "Okay" as in - "It's okay to take a break every now and then."  Also a sandy reef around coral.  Who wouldn't want to visit a cay?  Everyone would.  Who lives there?  No one.  That's why it's part of vaCAtion.

and finally

Tion — or "shun": to avoid people whom you have to be around in your regular life but whom you cannot stand.

English is a super-simple language.

Doors

Ideas can be life-changing. Sometimes all you need to open the door is just one more good idea. 

~ Jim Rohn 

- - - - -

So, I have this thing where children are drawn to me.  I'm not sure why.  I tend to tease them and ask them ridiculous questions.  

Anyway, last weekend at Elizabeth's softball tournament, three little girls came up to Julie and I with a little black pug puppy.  I don't much care for little dogs and I don't much care for pugs.  I was nice though, and when they asked if I wanted to hold the puppy, I said, "Sure."

The little dog licked my chin and was sort of cute in a bug-eyed sort of way.

"One of her eyes popped out," said one of the girls.

I held the puppy away from me so I could see it's face.  Both eyes seemed to be in the puppy's head.  "What do you mean?  How did that happen?" I asked.

"It happened when she got squashed in a door and her eye popped out," said another of the girls.

Julie then asked, "Well, did it go back in?!"

"Yes," said the third girl.  When we opened the door and she blinked, her eye went back in."

I then asked Julie if she wanted to hold the puppy.

Crap

All you have to do is to look like crap on film and everyone thinks you're a brilliant actress. Actually, all you've done is look like crap. 

~ Helen Mirren 

- - - - -

Craptic:  A piece of crap which is mysterious and obscure.

Example:  Why someone would create a ceramic duck with braids and an apron is craptic.

Food

(photo by Chris Fowler)

Bear in mind that you should conduct yourself in life as at a feast.

~ Epictetus

- - - - -

Michelle:   Elizabeth, what have you had for dinner?

Elizabeth:  Nothing.  I'll have cereal.

Michelle:  No, you need some protein.

Elizabeth:  Can I have cereal with meat in it?

Batman

Some days even my lucky rocketship underpants won't help.

~ Bill Watterson

- - - - -

Rocketship underpants may not help, but I think superhero underpants probably do.  Because then it's like you're wearing your superhero costume under your regular clothes.  Like Superman does when he's Clark Kent.

I used to like Superman the most.  I don't anymore.  I don't have anything against Superman, but I like Batman more.  Batman is just a regular guy with no radioactive bugbites and he's not an alien who crashed on earth when his home planet was destroyed.

Batman is just super-smart and super-rich with all kinds of cool crime-fighting tools.

In fact, I'm pretty much just like Batman.  Except for not being super-rich and only partially super-smart and not having a lot of cool crime-fighting tools.

Dog

People's dreams are made out of what they do all day.

The same way a dog that runs after rabbits will dream of rabbits.

It's what you do that makes your soul, not the other way around.

~ Barbara Kingsolver

- - - - -

A Haiku for Ripley

Don't eat the garbage.

It gives you diarrhea.

Stupid, nasty dog.

Imposing

I am just too much.

~ Joan Crawford

- - - - -

Michelle:  I hope if Elizabeth spawns, she spawns boys.

Chris:  Why?

Michelle:  I think it would be tough to have Elizabeth as a mom — especially for girls.

Chris:  Oh, I think you're right.  I'm crying just thinking about it right now.

Michelle:  I know.  It would be like, "NO MORE WIRE HANGERS!"

Photography

While there is perhaps a province in which the photograph can tell us nothing more than what we see with our own eyes, there is another in which it proves to us how little our eyes permit us to see.  ~Dorothea Lange

- - - - -

I am glad that both of the girls have an interest in photography. I think being able to take a good photo is a good skill to have. It can come in handy if you need to take pictures of corporate documents, or if you're a private investigator tracking someone's actions, or if you want to scrapbook family memories for future blackmailing purposes.  

Information

Where is the life we have lost in living? Where is the wisdom we have lost in knowledge? Where is the knowledge we have lost in information?

~ T. S. Eliot

- - - - -

So, I randomly check the history on our computer. I think it's a good thing to do to make sure I have some sense of what the girls are doing when they are on the computer.

Anyway, the other day I was looking at it and I found this in the history:

"18 Common Phrases to Avoid in Conversation."

But then I went to the link and couldn't find the 18 phrases.

My fear is that Elizabeth was looking them up and planning on incorporating them into her conversation

Past

No man is rich enough to buy back his past.

~ Oscar Wilde

- - - - - 

Julie:  We have a picture of Madeline in her "Future Mrs. Bieber" t-shirt.

Pete:  We're gonna pull that out in the future.

Madeline:  Why?

Julie:  Let's just say we all have things we're embarrassed about in our past.

Michelle:  Vanilla Ice

Julie:  Milli Vanilla

Pete: Shaun Cassidy

Madeline:  Why would I be embarrassed to like Justin Bieber?!

(NOTE:  I couldn't stop laughing when Pete said, "Shaun Cassidy.")  

Five

To practice five things under all circumstances constitutes 

perfect virtue; these five are gravity, generosity of soul, 

sincerity, earnestness, and kindness.

~ Confucius

- - - - -

Really?  A minimum of FIVE chicks?  I think that's ridiculous.  You should be able to take 2-3 chicks and try them first.  Who can eat five chicks in a sitting?!

America

Europe will never be like America. Europe is a product of history. America is a product of philosophy.

~ Margaret Thatcher

- - - - -

There is a ME and an I in America.  There are other letters, too.  But I see ME and I in America.  And here I am.  That's interesting, isn't it?

Mornings

We could hardly wait to get up in the morning.

~ Wilbur Wright

- - - - -

Elizabeth to Maddie about Chris and I: "They had to do rock, paper, scissors to see who was going to wake you."

Uncomplex

Any intelligent fool can make things bigger and more complex... 

It takes a touch of genius - and a lot of courage to move in the opposite direction. 

~ Albert Einstein 

- - - - -

Michelle:  There is too much to blog.  I can't keep up.

Chris:  You should blog that.

Elizabeth:  You should get a little recorder and tape it.

Michelle:  But I never know when it's going to be funny or just mean.

Insubordination

Boldness, without the rules of propriety, becomes insubordination.

~ Confucius

- - - - -

You know how sometimes you know there is a perfect word for soemething and you just can't remember the word?  That happens to me sometimes, but it's usually random words.  However, I always have that problem with the word "insubordination."  I had to look it up three times just to finish this blog post.

That's probably not a good word to forget.